{"id":106,"date":"2013-07-07T02:43:50","date_gmt":"2013-07-07T09:43:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/frankensteins_calculator_club\/?p=106"},"modified":"2013-12-15T11:37:04","modified_gmt":"2013-12-15T19:37:04","slug":"my-sausage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/my-sausage\/","title":{"rendered":"My Sausage"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In community college biology class I performed an experiment in which I collected all of the old keyboards from a computer lab that had not been upgraded in nearly a decade. <!--more--><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.123rf.com\/stock-photo\/vienna_sausage.html\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-127\" alt=\"9963393-a-single-vienna-sausage-at-an-angle\" src=\"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/frankensteins_calculator_club\/flavormagic\/uploads\/2013\/07\/9963393-a-single-vienna-sausage-at-an-angle.jpg\" width=\"168\" height=\"139\" \/><\/a>I eviscerated the keyboards. Once they were all uniformly ground into a fine powder, I put them through an\u00a0elaborate\u00a0refining process wherein the organic matter was to be separated from the inorganic. After undergoing several stages in a specialized\u00a0centrifuge, the organic material, such as food particles and flakes of human skin that had collected under the keys, had been extracted. This material, a virtual microbial zoo, was then compacted into a cylindrical mass similar in\u00a0proportion\u00a0to a Vienna Sausage. My\u00a0hypothesis was that I had created a super vaccene.<\/p>\n<p>With the hope of developing the antibodies and inheriting the immunities of a generation of weathered desert college\u00a0laureates, I ate the sausage.<\/p>\n<p>This is the origin of my superpowers.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In community college biology class I performed an experiment in which I collected all of the old keyboards from a computer lab that had not been upgraded in nearly a decade.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-106","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-writings"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/106","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=106"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/106\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":208,"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/106\/revisions\/208"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=106"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=106"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/fccmusic.com\/woz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=106"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}